Effective communication often eludes me. I’m the type of person that is either reaching for words that are just barely beyond my grasp or the words just come tumbling out of me uncensored. Neither of these strategies are particularly effective. The first type of attempt quickly turns futile as my struggle for the words only compounds my inability to find them. In the second scenario I often end up delivering a message that is a far cry from that which was originally intended.
However, neither of these are the type of scenario that has inspired my reappearance on WordPress. Instead my current conundrum is not related to the method in which I transfer my thoughts, but instead to my compulsion to say things that probably are best left unsaid. I am fascinated with how people think and why they do what they do. I want to understand as much as I can about anyone, but I have found that there are some things that people just don’t want others to know–or just aren’t interested in talking about. This can be difficult for me to accept because I am often interested in the minutiae of people’s’ lives as it gives me a better understanding of why they are who they are. This is especially the case when the people in question are those that I care about or am worried about and when things go wrong between someone who I care about and myself. I want to know why, even if I don’t believe that the problem in question should necessarily be fixed, I still feel the need to examine it within an inch of its life until I am able to understand it. If that is even possible.
This is just one of the many scenarios in which I think that I simply need to learn to let go. Although I become naturally fixated on figuring these things out, it is quite likely that others involved may feel a similarly strong need not to. And honestly? What good can it do to dig these problems up?
What do you think?
